Three of four young Indians say they feel lonely even when surrounded by friends, says a nationwide study of more than 4,500 people aged 15 to 29 across 24 states. “Still, when youngsters are emotionally distressed, nearly 80% turn first to friends first before family for support,” says Father John Alexander, vice provincial of the Don Bosco institutions in Chennai, who conducted the survey to understand how and why friendship is changing in the AI era.“We call it a loneliness paradox,” says the 59-year-old priest. “As opposed to earlier times, there are opportunities for larger networks these days. Youngsters have 20 to 30 friends, but when it comes to talking about real issues, and friendships with meaning and depth, there are none. There are more friendships, but fewer genuine ones.”Having worked extensively in schools and colleges, Alexander says he saw a decline in friendships in the AI age. “In my youth, it was my friends who helped me tide over crises. But now, that kind of intense friendships seem to be missing among the youth. I also came across many who were feeling guilty due to their neglect of friends.” This piqued his curiosity to find out how deep this malaise went, and hence he conducted the survey, respondents being from varied settings of schools, colleges and technical institutes in rural and urban areas.“Machines don’t demand mutual engagement and sacrifice unlike real friendships, and so youngsters find it easy to deal with machines, which can be switched off at any point, “ says Alexander. “But over time, they are getting disillusioned by AI’s advice, and prefer face-to-face engagement.” Nearly a third of the youngsters admitted they turn to AI for advice during friendship problems.Alexander, who holds a PhD in philosophy, has incorporated the study in a book, ‘Friendship as Well-Being in the AI Era’, which was discussed on Thursday, says the survey is only a starting point. “We want educators, parents, families and the govt to give attention and importance to friendships, at policy level.”Clinical psychologist Vandhana says young people are more impulsive and sensitive than previous generations, and don’t want a judgmental approach. “Turning to AI tools for advice is fine as long as they don’t rely on it completely.”
